pinpointed for oblivion 2

See you in the streets.

Sep 17

A Sequel to My Hit Children’s Novel: Shiny Bunny Wins Again

Gottlob: This is a cute picture and a very odd hashtag:
Ferdinand: Why odd?

Gottlob: I just think it’s funny to imagine clicking on the “#excellentsouvenier” hashtag to see what people think a good souvinier is!

I wish I knew how to spell souvenier.

Ferdinand: Click —-} picture of genital warts.

Gottlob: That is NOT a good keepsake, Ferdinand. I’m fairly sure of that.

Ferdinand: Souvenirs are for memory. Maybe it was the perfect embodiment of the experience.

Gottlob: “But Shiny Bunny…didn’t triumph. Not this time.

Farmer Brown wiped his blade clean on his bespattered coveralls and turned to walk away, perhaps forever.”

Ferdinand: Hey!

Gottlob: “Farmer Brown’s daughter would always cherish her new fur hat. It was really a great souvenier.”

Ferdinand: ……………………too sad…………………….

Gottlob: And genital warts weren’t!?

Anyways, I’m sorry. I was just trying to be funny…about the death of a bunny. Hm. Starting to see where I might have gone wrong here.

Ferdinand: can’t see too many salty tears for bunny

Gottlob: “‘But wait!’ shouted Farmer Brown. ‘I would never hurt Shiny Bunny, you know that.’

He reached behind him and produced the nose-snuffling rabbit, healthy and happy and bulgy as ever you please.

‘I just wanted to teach you a little lesson in cherishing the things you have. Besides, I’m a farmer for a reason: as a vegan, I would never let a daughter of mine wear real fur. That hat there is a prop I bought from an Alfred Hitchcock movie. Edith Head, you know.’

‘Gosh, Dad. That’s…kind of surprising.’

‘Well, let that be another lesson to you. Now let’s mosey—I reckon Momma Brown has a batch of her famous Provinçial Tartlets all whipped up and just perfect for hungry farmers.’”

Ferdinand: oh thank god

Sep 21
I’m working—I’m not working for you, slack motherfucker. 
Collision | @cfCollision

I’m working—I’m not working for you, slack motherfucker.
Collision | @cfCollision


Aug 5

Aug 2
It is important that he is wearing a moc-toe boot with no socks.

It is important that he is wearing a moc-toe boot with no socks.


Aug 1
raupenbahn:

Otto Griebel - Der Schiffsheizer (1920).


"Dude, can you put a shirt on and cut your smoke break short?  There’s like 8 people waiting for their coffee." —Me, to this Oakland barista

raupenbahn:

Otto Griebel - Der Schiffsheizer (1920).

"Dude, can you put a shirt on and cut your smoke break short? There’s like 8 people waiting for their coffee." —Me, to this Oakland barista

(via nocoastoffense)


Jul 31
mightyflynn:

Hunter Pence
AT&T Park
San Francisco, California
Photo by thetenssf

You might call this one…Pence-ive.

mightyflynn:

Hunter Pence

AT&T Park

San Francisco, California

Photo by thetenssf

You might call this one…Pence-ive.


Jul 24
Went shopping yesterday. 
Collision | @cfCollision

Went shopping yesterday.
Collision | @cfCollision


Jul 19
themostfunthing:

Me. With dog.

"Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?

And then…a savage argument broke out between man and dog, over just exactly who…the good boy was.

themostfunthing:

Me. With dog.

"Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?

And then…a savage argument broke out between man and dog, over just exactly who…the good boy was.


Jul 17

bouncex3:

Any Bx3 T shirts you’ve seen that you’ve kind of liked? Like at least 60% liked? Well you’re in luck, tonight from 9pm-3am, (6-12 PST) all t-shirts are 40% off. Now’s your chance.

http://skreened.com/bouncex3/

No code needed, just gotta check out between those times.

Took me forEVER to find this. But don’t you want to look this fuckin’ good? Spend the money.


Jul 12
todf:

Right next to Robinson Crusoe was Rocket Park.We’d smash soda cans flat and sit on them while sliding down that metal ramp. Note: that’s not me in the picture.

Ah, how I remember “Train Park” and “Fire Engine Park” from my hometown.  Both had actual names that I never, ever knew, because what’s a stupid arbitrary signifier as against the fact that the parks had, respectively, a TRAIN and a FIRE ENGINE in them?

There are no pictures.

There were no survivors.

todf:

Right next to Robinson Crusoe was Rocket Park.We’d smash soda cans flat and sit on them while sliding down that metal ramp. Note: that’s not me in the picture.

Ah, how I remember “Train Park” and “Fire Engine Park” from my hometown. Both had actual names that I never, ever knew, because what’s a stupid arbitrary signifier as against the fact that the parks had, respectively, a TRAIN and a FIRE ENGINE in them?

There are no pictures.

There were no survivors.


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